My husband can hold a grudge easily. It doesn't eat away at him or upset his day. I'm the opposite. If someone is upset with me for some reason, I have a hard time getting through the day without dwelling on it. I've always been this way. As a little girl, I would agonize if my parents were upset with me. My kids don't seem to get as upset when I'm angry at something that they did. I'm grateful that they don't let a momentary discord affect the whole day. Me? I have to do all I can to make things right. Sometimes, I discover that the other person may have never been a true friend.
Remember the bully situation on the block? Well, I used to be good friends with one of the mothers. After about a year of on and off wisecracks from her son, I finally spoke to "my friend" about the situation. I held off speaking to her for a long time. Maybe there was a part of me that knew she would turn against me. I guess I didn't want to shake up our friendship by bringing it to her attention in the first place. I hoped that she would want to work this out with me and maybe reach an arrangement where both boys can live amicably on the block. I didn't get into any kind of nasty screaming match or anything. All I did was try to discuss it with her. Now she acts like I don't exist. It hurts me that she doesn't value a friendship with me. I tried to reach out to her today by email. I have a feeling that she will ignore it. Why do I think that I have to be everyone's friend? I'm a 40 year old woman who gets hurt like I'm a 9 year old girl on the playground. I have always been the "sensitive one" in the family. Hopefully, that quality at least helps my poetry to bloom at times :)
My hubby jokes that he wishes I wouldn't take everything to heart. Looks like I always will.
