My Voice, My View

Uh oh! Mom is getting all worked up again...

2012-02-02T07:39:00.000-05:00

I clearly am fascinated with pregnancy. Once I hear that someone is pregnant, I get giddy in a way to find out all the details. Yesterday, my neighbor's daughter came by with her new son. I must have been gushing like anything because my oldest son thought that I made a spectacle of myself. You know how a teenager just loves it when his mom goes on and on about something!

I loved being pregnant. All those spontaneous emotions and surprising baby movements. Well, my boys love to remind me that I'm just so, so old when I get nostalgic for those days.

When I get excited about someone's good news about expecting a little one, I know that I'm celebrating life. It makes my heart soar. Gratefully, it doesn't bring back that sneaky morning sickness. lol

You know that I'm late getting dressed for the school bus. I just love these quick morning chats with all of you. See you soon!

Hey, what's going on in Room 10 during religion class?

2012-01-25T07:54:00.000-05:00

Between bites of toast, I need to tell you about my latest craziness. I teach religion class on Tuesday afternoons to a bunch of rambunctious and enthusiastic 4th graders. Needless to say, they have figured out that I have a playful side. No scary discipline threats from me. So you can imagine the kind of freestyle learning happening at times. I think my out of the box style is helping them enjoy religion class more though.

Anyway, here's a visual for you. I decide that I'm going to show them the wild side of John the Baptist in an impromptu performance. Once I get started teaching, I often turn into a drama queen. Hopefully, they got my point from my little act. Maybe there is a frustrated actress fighting to get out of me. Who would think that a shy little girl from the Bronx would all of a sudden want a little spotlight?

Better go finish that toast. Jillian needs her school clothes. That bus is coming!

Trying to keep up with the sprinting gal next to me

2012-01-20T10:01:00.000-05:00

Can you hear me panting? I just finished a power walk with a robot of a walking woman. Whatever calories that I just burned are lost as I look for a chocolate bar right now.

Every once in a while, I will go walk the track with a friend. Since I have three hours free in the morning before Jillian gets off the bus, I have been scheduling these friendly walks with various buddies around town. It is interesting to think about how varied these walks can be. Here are my three type of walking buddies:

The LOUD talker - bad thing when she gossips about PTA moms on a busy track

Speedy Gonzalez - woman goes right to 60 mph and doesn't slow down

The bench hunter - we might as well go to Dunkin Donuts (always an option with me) considering how many times we stop our walk.

Boy, are my feet sore. I bet she is going to bike cross county now. Her stamina is admirable. I try to look like I'm handling her pace with a smile as we walk lap gazillion. Apparently, I have a competitive side when it comes to walking. I want to match her lap by lap. My hamstrings are begging for 5 laps. I wish this kind friend of mine would not be so fond of 20 laps.

Here comes that guilt again

2012-01-17T15:06:00.000-05:00

I guess this Irish gal can't hide from her guilt about my blogging inactivity lately. I should be preparing my religion lesson plan right now for tonight, but I had to stop by and send out a hello to all of you. Too much to do and not enough time in the day apparently for me. Well, there is one other reason that I'm not blogging as faithfully lately. I have become addicted to Lost on Netflix. It doesn't take much for me to gravitate over to the television to get my daily fix of Lost. Now I know why so many people were hooked on it. I tell everyone not to tell me how it ends. If you watched the show, who were your favorite characters? Sawyer's one liners and smirks are awesome, and I love Hurely's gentleness and humor too.

Back to the bus stop I go. I have to get back on the blog. I do miss it. Help me get back since I seem to be "lost" in my current obsession. Miss you guys.

Stability is a good thing

2012-01-08T09:41:00.000-05:00

Remember the lovely Julie Andrews spinning on top of that mountain in The Sound of Music? Okay, now picture me on top of a mountain, jumping up and down in joy saying, "JOB!!!!" Can you believe it? My husband finally got hired as a permanent employee. It has been a long and bumpy journey, but I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of us. We will deal with the lower salary and juggle our finances around. It's great to have that stability of employment again and regular benefits. Thank you all for your prayers, advice, support and friendship over these years of on and off job hunting. I'll be glad to take a break from writing resumes and cover letters. I felt like a job hunting robot most of the time!!

Now to quote James Brown: "I feel good..." Hoping you all feel real good this morning too!

A Tweet Invades My Blog World

2012-01-04T20:40:00.002-05:00

CELEBRATE THE POSSIBLE!

What can I write in 2 minutes before Jillian calls me to help with the puzzle?

2011-12-30T15:08:00.000-05:00

Jillian has dismissed her brother and summons me to help with the puzzle. So since the post is waiting to be written....

Let's go random:

I ate a massive salad yesterday. A rabbit would've been thrilled with that lunch. I washed it down with a good helping of chocolate, just to add some flair!
Every year, I tell myself to avoid the Nerf gun section. I'm usually good about it. Well, this year, there was a super sale on them. I know that I'll regret this decision. I can hear my husband telling me that I have to run by those sale aisles next time.
I haven't had a new pair of glasses in 3 years. I'm excited to try on a ton of pairs tomorrow. Of course, I always second guess my final decision. The saleswoman always acts like the pair on my face is just so "fabulous." And then when I get home, I have to adjust to my new look.
I'm looking for a piece of paper that my husband wants me desperately to find. Of course, it seems to have disappeared in some kind of paper Bermuda Triangle.

Uh oh! Here comes the little one with her hands on her hips. Mommy can't hide from puzzle time anymore.

Before 2011 says adieu, I'll visit you all :)

P.S. What was your favorite song of the year? What was your favorite movie?

Paying for College: The Reality is Hitting Me Now

2011-12-29T14:19:00.004-05:00

My oldest son will be 15 in February. I am often bombarded by fellow parents with questions about saving for college. It is a daunting thought considering the staggering tuition amounts weighing heavily on parents' minds. When my son was first born, we started to put away money towards a college fund. After my husband was laid off twice in the past 5 years, we were grateful to have that extra money to dip into to keep us afloat. That college fund is a thing of memory right now. When thinking about funding college through loans, we have to keep in mind that we have three other kids following that path one on top of each other. It should be an interesting juggling of resources when that first tuition bill kicks in. I'm sure we'll figure out some kind of plan.

Here in New York, we have many good college/university options for commuters. The additional cost of boarding is definitely something we can't add to the bill. Unless they get a huge scholarship, my kids will probably have to be commuting college students. Having been a commuting college student, I know firsthand that there are many benefits to commuting. You don't really miss out on the college experience because you can still visit with friends on campus and go to parties. As a commuter, you also get the opportunity to take a break from campus life and relax at home without too much interruption. I also worked during my college years. I think that I gained some essential time management skills juggling college, work, social life, and home responsibilities. It was a maturing experience in many ways. I had responsibilities and didn't really have time to goof off too much. You all know me...I managed to find plenty of time to be silly with my friends. I couldn't live without those impromptu karaoke moments with friends. (Someday that karaoke vlog will come...)

I have spoken to my kids about the commuting likelihood. They seem okay with the idea. My oldest son has most of my downstairs anyway. I tell him that his space is like a mini bachelor pad. He just has to deal with me coming down to do laundry once in a while. Bonding time with Mom!

Most of their friends will probably dorm. I hope that my kids don't feel like they are missing out on something essential for their college experience. When it comes to the money, there is no way we could make dorming work. Maybe a car will be a nice incentive for them when the commuting begins.

I know that many of you have younger children, but I'm curious to hear everyone's opinion about the whole college/university selection process. What is your take on the pros and cons of dorming or not? Since I tend to be one of those protective moms (big surprise!), I'm kind of happy to have even my bigger kids come home and crash in their bedrooms. They will define their independence as commuting students day to day. I think it will all work out.

Another question: Are you worried about college costs too? I'm sure you are. Do you have a plan? I guess you can tell that this will be a big worry for my husband and I over the next ten years or so. Gulp! Did I say 10 years?? Thanks for your input.

Enjoy your Thursday!

Poetry Quickfire, inspired by Dad

2011-12-27T15:27:00.008-05:00

You all know how I love impressionist, expressionist, and fauvist artists. The fluidity and life of those canvases...

Dynamic

Walk as a fresh canvas
to offer life and love
for a share in pure bounty.

Blend my colors
as I sculpt the yes to you
and frame the world to matter.

See the whole being
with layers of healing peace
and gather a broken soul.

Grab the frayed paintbrush
to pull out the boldness
that joy demands of you.

Dedicated to my dear Dad (7/25/1932 - 12/27/2000) He believed in meaningful connections with others. I see how he added color and vitality to others' lives. I feel humbled by his example. Love you Dad.

Moments are gifts

2011-12-23T13:05:00.000-05:00

A little girl swirling her paintbrush with watercolor...

The smile on your son's face when you actually catch the football...

A plate of Christmas cookies arrives at your door...

A quick one liner on TV makes you giggle...

A wave to a friend across an auditorium...

The ease of the dinner table conversation...

A pleasant memory catching you off guard...

Turning the next page of a new book...

Reading the comments of a blogging buddy...

I miss you guys. 2012 will hopefully begin with less craziness for me. Here is my gift that I wish for all of you my dear friends: the comfort of peace.

Now my jokey side has to pipe in. What should I eat first: that foot long chocolate bar gift or homemade Christmas cookies? Do you notice that I totally ignored the fruit option in my fridge?

Merry Christmas! Time to find some tape. I better get wrapping...

Looking to connect: Be on your guard! Kelly is looking for meaningful conversations. (My husband will be the first to run out the door!)

2011-12-08T07:46:00.001-05:00

It seems like I'm on a mission to make real connections with all that I meet. I have come to the realization that it's worth the effort to take the time to get to know people. You should have seen me at my high school reunion trying to reconnect with a few women who were more interested in shrieking in delight when they recognized someone. It didn't take me long to see that I don't have a high tolerance at all for shrieking.

I have so much to share with all of you. I wish you could come along with me as I run to Jillian's school this morning. I will be covered in frosting most likely as I help build the frames for little gingerbread houses. Definitely it will not be a Martha Stewart kind of job with me in charge!

Maybe 2 AM is my best time to blog. Nice and quiet without any distractions. Now for staying awake...that's the challenge. But I'm up for it because I miss connecting with all of you.

Time to dust off the toast crumbs from my pajamas. I have two sleepy kids who need a big push to get motivated for the dash to the school bus.

Wish me luck that 20 mini gingerbread houses don't collapse!

Remember when we used to play games?

2011-12-01T16:13:00.001-05:00

I am in that kind of mood again. Let's play "Would You Rather..."

Would you rather tame a circus lion or fly in the air on a trapeze?

Would you rather live on a tropical island or in a castle?

Would you rather have lunch with a movie star (your choice) or a world leader (your choice)?

Would you rather take a sculpture class or a karate class?

Would you rather dress fancy or dress casual most of the time?

Would you rather see an old teacher or an old boyfriend/girlfriend?

Would you rather backpack through Europe on a bike or cruise the Mediterranean in luxury?

Here are my answers: trapeze, castle, movie star (Hugh), sculpture class, dress casual, old teacher, backpack through Europe. I hope you all play along. It will be fun to see your answers.

5 minute blog post

2011-11-29T07:52:00.001-05:00

I'm sitting here with my wet hair in a towel eating rice krispies. I know, what an image! Here are a few random thoughts as I enjoy this 5 minutes of "me" time before getting the two youngest on the bus.

I would love to be one of those amazingly organized and festive Christmas decorators. I don't think it's a destined role for me. As long as the kids don't wrap each other up in garland, I'm happy.
My 25th high school reunion is on Friday. Fancy event: it will be held in my high school cafeteria :) I'll keep the tiara at home. It should be good for a few laughs. Hoping to organize some karaoke.
During my three hour kid break in the morning, I seem to be at Jillian's school all the time with my volunteer gigs. The morning flies by. Her smile is worth all the work.
The jewelry party was fun. I'll show off my complimentary necklace soon :)
My mashed potatoes came out perfect on Thanksgiving. Now that's an accomplishment for this Irish gal. I make them every holiday and this is the first time that they were (quoting Gordon Ramsay) "spot on."
Better run and find a pair of pants. I can't go to the school in this beat up old robe.

Hugs to you all. Now where is my mousse to control this ever expanding hairdo of mine? Did I just write "hairdo?" I'm dating myself once again.

party planning on the fly: Kelly style (sounds like a cable TV show)

2011-11-17T07:56:00.000-05:00

Remember the Elastic Mom superhero in the movie The Incredibles? Add a curly wig and it's me these days!

A couple of months ago, I was drafted to host a lia sophia jewelry party at my house. The jewelry advisor was smart enough to entice Jillian with the party and then I had to give in. I'm happy that there will be a good sale. I think it will be fun and I invited some friends for some chocolate too. The party is this Saturday. My husband is on kid duty to supervise all the kids who will be zooming around my yard. I'm sure he'll be counting down the minutes until the whole thing is over. I'm ordering a big hero to at least keep his belly happy.

I'll show off a jewelry piece on my next vlog. Now I just have to see if there is any jewelry piece that could jazz up my "so so" wardrobe. I guess a tiara would be too much??? Oh well! At least I can play dress up like Jillian :)

Off to get the little ones on the school bus. Hope to visit you all soon.

Join me as I try to get the fire going over at Write With Pictures

2011-11-13T09:50:00.002-05:00

Thanks to all your encouragement, I am getting these rusty writing muscles moving.

Come on over and jump into the writing game with me for a few moments over at Write With Pictures. Bloggers are writers who throw it all out there in writing. There's a word waiting to inspire a touch of creativity in you.

Let's have a writing party this Sunday over at my long lost blog, Write With Pictures. After soccer, I'll add my 2 cents worth of creativity over there too.

Hope to see you there. Let me know what you think of this Sunday writing idea. Better go put those soccer cleats on my son. He's going to track mud all over the living room unless I lovingly tackle him now. See you later!

Squeeze it onto my to-do list

2011-11-12T09:58:00.001-05:00

I have to be committed. Now don't get scared. I mean that I have to be committed to putting that first word down on paper. There is a story somewhere floating around in the unspoken parts of this frazzled brain of mine. Why can't I force myself into this much needed commitment for my restless creative spirit? I need a push. Will you guys gently push me that way? Maybe all it takes at first is 10 minutes a day. Me and a notebook staring out the window.

I'm sure something will start percolating. I'm usually a "dive head first" kind of girl. My routine life (which I love in many ways) is keeping my pencil away. Finding the time and energy is necessary for me. The creative within is getting antsy. I better let her show her stuff.

My assignment for today: Think of a few good opening lines. Start small; think big.

I wrote this post while there was a brewing battle 20 feet from me. Deep breath Kel. Time for me to get creative and redirect their battling energy. It's going to be a long winter, I fear. Maybe we'll just have to unleash all this kid energy by running around outside. Mama calories can be burned too!

Prayer requests

2011-11-11T10:59:00.001-05:00

I feel lost and sad today. It has been an upsetting week. My cousin, Gerri, was killed in a car crash on Sunday. A man ran a red light and hit her car. Her 11 year old granddaughter was in the car. Gratefully she wasn't injured. I can't imagine the grief of that young girl. Gerri was a wonderful woman who loved life and shared her joy with everyone.

Please pray for Gerri's family. They are hurting so much.

I would also appreciate your prayers for me as I am having trouble with my youngest son. He is having extreme angry outbursts and emotional breakdowns. I don't know what to do. I feel like I can't reach him. I'm overwhelmed this morning. I pray that I find some way to know what is going on with him.

Thank you my friends. - Kelly

Charades with one flashlight in a chilly living room gets old after the tenth round

2011-11-03T16:51:00.000-04:00

Loved how Jillian's face brightened when I walked into her classroom for open house today. That is one of those memorable mommy moments that I'll hold onto for a long time. After the past few days of crazy weather and power outages, I need that kind of sweet normalcy.

I couldn't believe the steady big snowflakes coming down as I looked out the church window during my son's Confirmation on Saturday. The celebration was beautiful and I did get choked up (typical me at those kind of things). As we clung to each other chilled by this sudden October snowstorm, we were all nervous about road conditions.

I had all this catered food coming to the house for the party. Well, everyone ate quickly and rushed to their cars after a short while. Some of our friends didn't even make it to the party. We had a lot of leftover food. About an hour after the last guest left, our power went out. Never a good thing. We had our fingers crossed that the outage wouldn't last long

By the second day of no power, we were getting stir crazy. Sitting on the couch trying to keep warm, we dreaded 6 pm when the whole house went dark. Our creative idea bank ran dry soon enough and we would try to sleep early. We lost the lights, heat, hot water, telephone, Internet and all the food in the fridge (including $200 worth of the party food.)

The town was out of operation. You had to travel to neighboring towns to find supermarkets that were open. When we would emerge from the house in the morning, I felt like we looked like cave dwellers or walking zombies. I'm sure that I was a sight. By the third day, the power came back. Heat is real good, and lights are much appreciated after that experience.

I had to stop typing just now because I noticed what seems to be hundreds of black birds in my yard's trees. Geez, please tell me that I'm not living in a Hitchcock movie all of a sudden. Miss you all. Blogging Kelly is back and ready to rock and roll :)

Busy time

2011-10-26T07:12:00.000-04:00

It's 7:10 AM. High schooler left 20 minutes ago. Getting middle schooler ready to leave in 5 minutes. Two more kids to go. Morning is a busy time. This week, every moment seems crazy. Count down to my son's Confirmation on Saturday. Missing you all. I will check in with you next week.

Is it too early for chocolate??? Never!

Kel, push that quickfire out (oh those "contraction" flashbacks!)

2011-10-18T09:47:00.002-04:00

My son's confirmation is right around the corner. It turns out that October has been a crazy month for me too. I really miss visiting all of you. I need to work on my lesson plan for this afternoon's religion class. I'll see how much I get accomplished considering there are those cleaning fumes permeating the house as my burner gets cleaned right now.

Waiting outside Jillian's ballet class, I forced myself to get some kind of poem out. Here it is with all its rough edges. At least, it's a start. Thanks for reading!

"Cut It Free"

With laser precision

my eye of conquest

fathomed unsaid coiled

under layers of necessary

that gelled to clouds.

That lance of intent

burns hot through static

pulsing through repetition

sectioned a chisel

that shaped a willful hand.

When I write a poem, I stare off into the distance. I'm sure some of the other dance moms were wondering if I was spacing out. Anyway, I'm glad that I forced this one out in that 10 minutes. I need to get back on the horse. It may be a rocky ride at first, but I'm sure I'll "be back in the saddle again." I couldn't resist that reference. My Dad loved those old cowboy movies. That line is for you, Dad.

When I have a good hair and voice day, you will see that promised karaoke vlog. Jillian reminds me all the time.

Poetry, teaching, and finding that elusive piece of me

2011-10-14T09:27:00.002-04:00

Running around like a crazy lady has kept me from my need to be creative. I worry that I have somehow lost my poetic "fire." The words and images are not knocking on my door as often. I need to slow my pace and listen for the Muse again. This is a time when I could use a Thoreau type of retreat. Well, I guess my deck will have to be my place away to think and create. I feel those butterflies in my belly now as I fear that the poetry will stay away. "Kelly on the go" really has to become "Kelly needs to reflect."

I don't want to lose that part of me. I will mourn that loss. The blog can become my forum again for the poetry. I just have to commit the time and clear my mind. Now if only I could put a "Do Not Disturb" sign around my neck for 15 minutes...

On another note, I am enjoying my time as a volunteer religion teacher on Tuesday afternoons. I have a lively, enthusiastic class. They like my out of the box lesson plans. I wish that I also majored in education way back when. I feel alive in the classroom. My classroom management is probably a little too loose for some veteran teachers, but I think that the kids are engaged in the material. You all know that I throw in some comedy here and there. Jillian is my little assistant teacher. She gets a kick out of helping with the kids. They all have adopted her as a little sister too. She looks like a mini me when she uses my teacher gestures.

I'm ringing the bell, boys...this round is over!

2011-10-06T12:54:00.003-04:00

And I thought pushing out these 4 kids was difficult! Mama/referee job is way more exhausting for me. I have good kids, but they sure know how to stir things up with each other. Maybe I have to see these turbulent pockets in our day as the growing pains that I have to deal with as a mom.

I appreciate the silence. I can feel how the downtime helps to arm me emotionally to take on the next mini battle of the boys that will inevitably erupt at the dinner hour.

Creativity always seems to serve me well when I'm in a moment of stress. I think it's time for me to creatively referee the next battle. The boys don't know what is in store for them. This mama wants to change things up and redirect all that troublesome energy. Now to come up with an idea.

If only my boys had a desire to grace the stage, then I would see a constructive outlet for the drama. Maybe that's the approach. I'll have them role play when they get in an argument. I can just feel the eyes rolling when I suggest this resolution strategy.

Will they humor me? Probably not. I guess I'll have to continue the divide and conquer approach until I think of another strategy or they are in college.

Quick question to all you veteran moms: Is there such a thing as an easy age once kids start pushing away and pushing each other? Right now in my house, 14, 12 and 8 are rough and tumble ages crashing into each other all the time. Is it all that testosterone? I can feel their need to outdo the other in words or actions. All this competitiveness seems to be filling the air whenever they begin an activity or engage in a debate. I'll keep repeating this mantra as the boys get into it: "Kids can be wonderfully entertaining and draining simultaneously. You will miss this craziness soon enough."

Enjoying this short time of silence. The gang will be arriving soon. Patience, please rain down on me.

Questions to Ponder

2011-10-04T12:11:00.000-04:00

Why do kids look to battle right in front of you during every phone conversation?

How do I escape a "close talker" (remember Seinfeld) at the bus stop?

How can I bottle all my stress and make it go away today?

What should I make for dinner? (the question that never goes away)

Why does my 8 year old run from books? (is he my kid??)

Would I look silly trying to dance in Jillian's ballet class? (oh how tempting it is!)

Has anyone watched The Tudors? (what a find for me on NetFlix when I'm folding laundry)

Why does my PC want to be very kooky these days? (always when I want to blog)

Where is that last cookie? (if only you could tell me!!)

Stealing some blogging time

2011-09-29T16:30:00.000-04:00

I was making play doh pizzas with Jillian a few minutes ago. They were quite colorful. Remembering dinner, I ran upstairs to check on the turkey breast in the oven and decided to sneak in a blog post.

Let me think of a few things that I learned so far this week:

My boys tease me that they don't want "thinking" wives who talk too much. Hey, is that a playful shot at me?
Jillian loves dance like me. Hopefully, she's more coordinated.
My bathtub is not made for an adult to use. You should have seen me trying to get into some kind of position that would help me get that oatmeal bath water on the poison ivy rash. Crazy yoga kind of moment. I need a luxury tub apparently. Mr. Trump, do you have an extra to spare?
Why do I have to have a show and tell moment every time someone asks me about the poison ivy? I find myself saying, "Wait until you see this" and then show off my arms. Why can't I just keep it as my little itchy secret? It's much better today by the way.
I need to bring a laptop to the bus stop so I can blog. That's where I feel like I spend most my time.

The play doh pizza chef is calling for me. I better get going. Maybe I'll do a midnight visit to your blogs. Now if only I could stop dozing off at 11:00...

I'll give you another 10

2011-09-20T12:27:00.000-04:00

Check me out - 2 days in a row. Here I go with another ten about me since I was playfully tagged by my lovely friend, Yvonne.

I can mold brownie crumbs from the pan into a decent size chocolate morsel at lunch.
Now my belly's itchy...ugh! poison ivy please leave me be.
Jillian loved moving in slow motion during her ballet class.
I guess I should have the cleanest house in town since I'm kid free for 3 hours. Can I have the whole school year to reach that goal? Please??
Haven't seen Maury Povich show in years. Whole lotta screaming and carrying on gets ratings apparently.
My kids think that my 4th grade religion class today will walk all over me. They said that I can't make a tough enough face. I'll try to win them over with charm. No chocolate bribery allowed...figures.
My 25 year high school reunion is coming up. Please tell me that the reunion committee rounded up that number by a decade.
Apparently, the closest I'm getting to a fantasy experience is playing in my son's fantasy hockey league.
I need a poetry pick me up or something. The words are not happening. I need to calm this moving mind.
I'm happy to knock on all your doors over the next few days here in bloggyland. Can you feel my big virtual hug? Sorry that I can't share that brownie morsel.

I'm here just rushing around (October will be better for blogging hopefully)

2011-09-19T09:49:00.000-04:00

Ten things about me to share as I devour my morning bagel:

You can connect the bumps of poison ivy on my arms.
I'm starting to feel the emotional crash of those first crazy weeks of school.
Some days I think that my fast talking makes people's heads spin.
Jillian will dance for the first time in ballet shoes this afternoon.
I begin my adventure as a rookie religion teacher on Tuesday afternoons.
I have to hide some days from all that PTA email.
Saturday is my only free activity day.
Am I ready for the drama of high school?
Debating about adding yoga to my morning or more Oreo's.
I miss all my blogging buddies.

Hoping to visit you all during lunch, assuming Jillian doesn't declare it's Barbie party time in her room. Here is the song in my head: "It's been a hard day's night and I've been working like a dog..." That Beatles karaoke will be coming soon.

Just call me Bus Stop Kelly

2011-09-09T16:25:00.003-04:00

Please set up a few stop signs to get me back with all of you here. I need my blogging vitamin. It has been "go, go, go" this first week of school.

Here is a quick recap of my week. I will try to keep each event to one sentence. I have to run to the soccer field in a little while, and I'm not sure we have soccer socks without holes handy!

A praying mantis entertained the kids while I weeded for the PTA.

Jillian struts her stuff in a sparkly, pink outfit getting on the kindergarten bus.

Friends want to hang out for a brownie sanctuary break while all 4 kids are in school.

I cried in my driveway after Jillian got on the bus.

I also cried during "I Dreamed of Africa" with Kim Basinger while making unsteady piles of folded laundry.

My third grader's teacher went ballistic and yelled at the whole class for 30 minutes on the second day of school.

My high school freshman said "making out" in front of his siblings and somewhat shocked mom who was trying to make a left hand turn.

My middle school son didn't get lost or trampled in the hallway.

I should have done yoga instead of eating chocolate each morning.

Sweet Jillian announced to the whole bus stop yesterday, "It's Mom's 43rd birthday, and she'll be 80 soon!"

Jillian will be in pre-ballet class in 2 weeks.

Brothers refuse to be her dance partners.

It's a very quiet house after 15 years of always having a kid at my side.

Any of you blogging buddies want to do lunch or brownies?

Coming by to see you all soon!

A beep here and a buzz there

2011-09-02T15:26:00.001-04:00

On top of having this wild hair, I think that I figured out why kids are stopping to look at me more frequently at the park or pool. They must think that I'm a robot because my pocketbook is beeping or buzzing a lot these days. I have discovered texting and my texting friends love to send me notes all the time. It can be fun and exhausting when you have this constant back and forth exchange throughout the day.

I used to tell my teen son that I would never text. Well, look at me now. I have to admit that I like that instant fix of connecting with a pal especially when I'm feeling stressed or overwhelmed.

My husband also set my phone for email too. Each time an email comes in, there is a ding coming from my pocketbook too. I have three email addresses - long story. So I get email coming in all the time. Once all that PTA email starts pouring in, I'll be flooded daily with those updates and requests. Good thing that I put the phone on vibrate at church. All these notifications would cause such a "buzz" with the dignified ladies in the front pew. Excuse the pun.

Hoping to do the vlog this weekend. Getting ready for school here with the kiddos. Jillian is excited. The boys??? Not so much.

Checking in

2011-08-30T08:25:00.001-04:00

I hope to get back on the blogging track soon. The kids go back to school in one more week. We gratefully got through the storm okay here. We were lucky that my power was only out for 10 hours. Thousands in my town are still without power. They may have to go the whole week without it.

I'm weeding and planting at the middle school grounds today. Cool temperatures for that task are very appreciated. My kids will be my landscaping crew. It looks like I'll be a busy PTA mom this year once again. My husband kids me about all my volunteer gigs.

I will probably be a basket case when Jillian gets on the kindergarten bus next Tuesday. She will be fine. I'll have to keep it together in front of the other moms.

Hoping to post that long overdue vlog soon!! The summer went by very fast.

Miss you all. Time to get Jillian her second waffle. As I glance in the window reflection, I see that it is also time for me to get a haircut. My waking up hair makes me look like a mad scientist right now.

Sunday Citar

2011-08-21T15:17:00.003-04:00

John Singer Sargent - "The Fountain, Villa Torlonia, Frascati, Italy"

A chief event of life is the day in which we have encountered a mind that startled us.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Microfiction Muse

2011-08-17T10:47:00.001-04:00

For Microfiction Muse, my pal, Diane, invites us to write a short, short story in 140 characters or less (including spacing and punctuation) inspired by the above photograph.

Below is my microfiction for today:

Dad looks steamed. Maybe he won't be as mad about the wreck, once he sees how I turned his favorite ride into modern art. Fingers crossed.

So this would be my tweet right now

2011-08-16T10:01:00.003-04:00

Count on a game of "Go Fish" to keep the kids busy and Mama happy eating her scone.

Vicky is a champion! Praying for her peaceful healing.

2011-08-15T08:23:00.000-04:00

Today, I will tell my kids about the power of faith, grace, hope, and love. Today I will tell them the story of my amazing friend Vicky and how she is my hero.

Please take a moment to visit Vicky and read her post about "wholeness." She had her mastectomy on Friday. Her words will touch your heart and soul. God bless Vicky for all the healing that she gives each of us through her example and words.

Am I stretched out on some kind of therapy couch right now?

2011-08-12T17:13:00.002-04:00

It took awhile for me to feel comfortable in this skin. Spoken and unspoken insecurities rode my back for many years. There is a liberation in the feeling that I like almost 43 year old me, imperfections and all. Being human is an interesting race with obstacle courses popping up unexpectedly. I like figuring my way around the traffic jams of life. Those traffic jams push me to be more assertive, more creative, and more flexible.

I'm the emotional one in the family. Sensitive to the core. However, when things get super tense here lately, I feel my emotional strength and resilience helping me shake off difficulties. Job stress and all, I think this is a good zone of my life. Maturity is helping me push on through. At 20 or 30 something, I would absorb all the stress and let it eat away at me. Not anymore. I kind of feel like saying, "Bring it on."

I think Oprah may be right about getting older and getting better. Even with all this ever returning gray, I shake off the superficial worries and get to the heart of what makes me tick. That core of me...that core of you...that core of us all erasing differences and celebrating the breath of life in every beautiful human soul.

So many of you wonderful bloggers are champions of life. My soul grows richer when reading your posts full of honesty, warmth, reflection and humor. This is the best club to be in, hanging out with all of you.

When I sat down to type 5 minutes ago, I was going to do one of my random posts. My first thought was going to be "so I'm having a banana right now." Well, the post went in another direction. Another quick thought: this could be a good example to show the kids how bananas are brain food. I tell them that nutritious fact all the time, right before they dash for potato chips.

Looking forward to visiting you all. Lots of pool days over the past few weeks. Big surprise, still no tan here. This Irish girl is not made for tanning. If it wasn't for sunblock, I would be as red as a lobster.

Ending that dream was necessary for me

2011-08-05T15:09:00.002-04:00

I was startled awake. My mind must have pushed me back to a reality that I could handle. It was a strange feeling last night as I curled up to try and process that dream.

Have you ever told yourself to "wake up" within a dream? The dream was very "present" to me as I was experiencing it. Then it took a turn that scared me when I sensed that my cherished loved one (who is very much alive and part of me forever) was leaving me. That feeling of her mortality in this dream sequence was something that I had to run away from. I can distinctly remember yelling at myself in the dream to wake up. And I did. There was an urgency or desperation in my desire to wake up from that dream. As I sit here typing, I feel unsettled by the experience.

So I guess it is true that you can wake yourself up from a dream or nightmare. Anyone else have a similar dream escape experience?

The boys think that I need a "mute" button

2011-08-01T18:58:00.000-04:00

"What will Mom say next?" I imagine that phrase pops in the boys' minds often these days. As I get older, I seem to have misplaced my childhood shyness. Now I interject my opinion often in conversation. Am I turning into an extrovert? Age has been good to me in this regard. I speak my mind and share my sometimes crazy ideas. (Yesterday, I tried to organize a bunch of moms to dance with me in my living room to celebrate National Dance Day which happened on Saturday.) You should have seen the boys' faces. I love dance, but I can't dance. Maybe I'm just so tired of stress, and I'm looking for fun.

By the way, those moms didn't go for my dance invitation. I know some of you would have joined me, right? Randi? Kim? Susan? T-Rex Mom? Jenners? Wish I could organize a blog party in my backyard. You guys would indulge my crazy ideas!! Until that party happens, I'll just embarrass the boys with my shenanigans. Hmmm, shenanigans...I like that word. It makes me sound like a crafty leprechaun or something.

Oh, that vlog is coming. Get ready. Unscripted and hopefully somewhat interesting for all of you :)

I'll be dancing over to your lovely blogs very soon. Jillian's birthday is tomorrow. I need to go buy some cute girly toys tonight.

Green with life and promise

2011-07-28T16:43:00.000-04:00

They are just ordinary green leaves. I see them all the time when I'm sitting here typing. I gaze at them from time to time for no real reason. But today, they look different to me. They may not be swaying palm trees inviting me to a waiting beach yards from my home. But they are just the bit of reliable nature that I need to keep me sort of centered.

I'm realizing that it is all about perspective. Things are good here. A job will come. We make our own happiness. I will be satisfied with where we are at right now. I choose to keep on smiling. Those leaves remind me that you can't ignore all the beauty and goodness in this world. It's here for me to dive into and rejuvenate.

Time for me to go sit on the front steps and blow some bubbles with Jillian. Maybe a few of those bubbles will find their way up to those friendly green leaves that greet me each day as I type away. It's good to be taken out of all that constant stress and drama going on in your head. Maybe God's message of comfort and reassurance is sitting in those tree limbs and I need to let it all go.

Microfiction Muse

2011-07-27T12:41:00.000-04:00

My friend, Diane, hosts Microfiction Muse where she invites us to write a short, short story of 140 characters or less (including spacing and punctuation) inspired by a select photo prompt.

Here is my microfiction inspired by this cute picture:

Dishpan hands! Chief Elf Harry is going to hear from me! Cleaning up after Santa at his summer getaway is not worth the extra candy canes.

Feeling the loss of you in the everyday; striving to connect with you in the silence

2011-07-25T18:00:00.001-04:00

I can imagine your gentle eyes focusing on the boys' chess moves as they sit across from me now. I wish they knew you. I can imagine my daughter's eyes lighting up when you would compliment her latest outfit. I wish she knew your hugs.

Has it really been 11 years since your generous laugh faded into memory?

The other night, I closed my eyes real tight like I was 9 years old trying so hard to visualize you in my mind. I don't want it to be difficult to get the real you back in my mind. Why can't I look at photos still even after all these years? I like to stop and think though of what you would say about something I read or something I wrote.

I miss you Daddy. I always will. I'll keep reaching for your hand. Some days I feel so little and vulnerable. A dad's hug would make it so much better.

Happy Birthday in Heaven. Love to think that you're having one of your favorites, chocolate donuts.

Want a t-shirt with my new motto?

2011-07-21T23:02:00.003-04:00

To think of me getting a revelation while cleaning up doll accessories all over my living room floor.

While doing that always fun activity, I'm taking in all of "So You Think You Can Dance."

Those dancers half my age amaze me with their musicality, skill, and abandon each week.

So here comes the revelation that pops into my overworked brain.

Dance More; Eat Less

I know...Confucius would envy my stay-at-home mom wisdom. (insert sarcastic grin here)

Anyway, back to my need for revelation.

So what does it matter that I'm not a gifted dancer in any way? I can dance, and I will. We all are dancers when we figure out that choreography churning around inside.

What about you?

(P.S. Grumpy 8 year old is standing next to me at 11:01 pm. He can't sleep due to the heat. I guess I will waltz him off to sleep :)

Just another random morning

2011-07-21T07:55:00.001-04:00

I feel that need to go all random with my blog today. So here goes.

Camp Kelly is in full swing, and I'm one tired camp counselor this morning. We haven't had a vacation since 2006. Once a stable job comes, I can't wait to pack my suitcase for anywhere. The kids always ask about going somewhere, going anywhere. I'm so glad that we have the town pool. We get a lot of use out of that pool pass. Hopefully, we'll get lucky soon with a job, and we can plan a little getaway maybe next year.
I have an article deadline every Tuesday morning. I tend to get my article done (inspiration and writing) in 30 minutes. I write about parenting issues for yorktown.patch.com. No pay for these articles yet. However, my writing resume is growing. If you google me, a good number of pages come up about my article writing. I'm hoping that some supplemental income will come our way through my writing one day.
I want my sons to crack open those math workbooks this summer. I keep emphasizing to them that 30 minutes a day will make a big difference when they go back to school in September.
I miss blogging. I can tell that there is something missing when I don't get to visit all of you. The job hunt, job brainstorming, writing those unpaid articles, and keeping the kids entertained is really keeping me busy these days.
I'm planning on putting up that karaoke vlog post with my kids' help this weekend. They think that I should sing Lady Gaga (like that would happen) instead of Elvis!

I'll try to visit you all soon. It will be a hot one here in NY today. Enjoy your day :)

Watch this video...you'll smile

2011-07-17T17:42:00.001-04:00

In the spirit of yesterday's post, "Lift me up, Lord..."

Nothing like a good hug :) I'm going to try and give some extra hugs everyday. That's my kind of soul medicine.

Stepping into a moment of prayer

2011-07-15T20:55:00.000-04:00

I pass the overflowing sink of dishes. I forget about the clothes to be folded. I step out onto my deck this early evening. The chill of the air washes over me. I stand up straight and stretch my neck as I gaze up into that darkening sky. No one hears me as I say, "Lift me up." I know that He hears me.

My Opening Karaoke Vlog Act

2011-07-14T18:00:00.000-04:00

Me? Sit Still?

2011-07-09T15:25:00.001-04:00

If you ask my mom about my activity level, she would say that I'm always on the move. Even as a little girl, I couldn't sit still. I'm amazed to think that I would sit so contentedly in those wooden college seats listening with all my being to my literature professors. Even though I sat quietly, I felt my mind loving the constant journey of ideas in all those great works. I'll never worry that there is no rest stop in that journey. A new image or a new idea is always ready for those who want to chase it, harness it, and digest it.

Movement fascinates me. I'm starting to realize how I look for movement in all the things that I enjoy. When I watch a beautifully choreographed dance, I feel my soul lift. When I get caught up in the movement of brushstrokes on a "breathing" canvas, I feel doors within open. When I run through the yard with my children laughing, I feel my heart do cartwheels.

The more I move, physically, intellectually, and emotionally, I find treasures of peace and jolts of excitement.

Here I am, Energizer Kelly. Mom, I still run around, but now I found out why.

Keep on moving. Keep that engine going. You're fueled up and ready to go.

(P.S. The karaoke vlog (scary) is coming soon. Hopefully, you'll all still follow me after that spectacle. Time for me to move my derriere out of this chair and find that swimsuit. A pool party is calling my name. I promise not to sing there. My kids would probably dunk me quickly after that performance.)

Flash Fiction

2011-07-08T10:18:00.003-04:00

Caspar David Friedrich - "Woman at the Window"

Here is my flash fiction (55 words) inspired by this beautiful painting by Friedrich.

“My Elisa, turn around. I need your eyes to soften for me.” Peter would sail to a land of unknown beauties, both natural and human. Elisa feared that his love would not hold. She ached to think Peter could feel the chains wrapping around her heart when he would call to her from the dock.

Microfiction Muse

2011-07-06T20:23:00.001-04:00

(Don't know why the blogger elves are giving me a duplicate post...mysterious!!)

Playing along with Diane today for Microfiction Muse. Diane invites us to write a short, short story in 140 characters or less (including spacing and punctuation) inspired by a photo prompt.

Kidnapping my Barbie is a serious offense. Reveal her location and I won't show that naked butt baby picture to your girlfriend.