Friday, August 12, 2011

Am I stretched out on some kind of therapy couch right now?

It took awhile for me to feel comfortable in this skin.  Spoken and unspoken insecurities rode my back for many years.  There is a liberation in the feeling that I like almost 43 year old me, imperfections and all.  Being human is an interesting race with obstacle courses popping up unexpectedly.  I like figuring my way around the traffic jams of life.  Those traffic jams push me to be more assertive, more creative, and more flexible.

I'm the emotional one in the family. Sensitive to the core. However, when things get super tense here lately, I feel my emotional strength and resilience helping me shake off difficulties.  Job stress and all, I think this is a good zone of my life.  Maturity is helping me push on through.  At 20 or 30 something, I would absorb all the stress and let it eat away at me.  Not anymore.  I kind of feel like saying, "Bring it on."

I think Oprah may be right about getting older and getting better.  Even with all this ever returning gray,  I shake off the superficial worries and get to the heart of what makes me tick.   That core of me...that core of you...that core of us all erasing differences and celebrating the breath of life in every beautiful human soul.

So many of you wonderful bloggers are champions of life. My soul grows richer when reading your posts full of honesty, warmth, reflection and humor.  This is the best club to be in, hanging out with all of you.

When I sat down to type 5 minutes ago, I was going to do one of my random posts.  My first thought was going to be "so I'm having a banana right now."  Well, the post went in another direction.  Another quick thought: this could be a good example to show the kids how bananas are brain food.  I tell them that nutritious fact all the time, right before they dash for potato chips.

Looking forward to visiting you all.  Lots of pool days over the past few weeks. Big surprise, still no tan here. This Irish girl is not made for tanning.  If it wasn't for sunblock, I would be as red as a lobster.

22 comments:

Kelly L said...

I like my 45 year old thought process much better and I have earned every line and gray hair - but it's the boobs - I miss my 21 year old boobs.. lol.. Tonight we are having the 1st of the last two pool parties of the summer - well my kids are... This summer has gone by way too fast..
Happy Friday!
I've Become My Mother

Gail Dixon (Louisiana Belle) said...

So beautifully expressed. I have found that with age comes a certain calm resilience. I used to panic at the first problem; now I step back and try to look at things more rationally. Like you, I am the emotional one. Fifty years of life's lessons has toughened me up. But not too much. :) Thinking of you this evening and praying blessings for you and yours.

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Wonderfully written, yes the expereience of age does bring a bit of wisdom into our lives.
Wishing all the best.

Yvonne.

Kim said...

Sigh. I loved this my friend. Especially this: That core of me...that core of you...that core of us all erasing differences and celebrating the breath of life in every beautiful human soul.

I am starting to feel a little of this too. That need to cut the crap and figure it out. I too am relieved to have shaken most of that insecurity of the 20s and 30s. Forty isn't all that bad:)

And yes, my friend, your words are like a wonderful hug I can feel! Thank you.

kisatrtle said...

A wonderful post...looking forward to your visits

Valerie said...

Pssst... it gets better!

Happy weekend.

Randi said...

I loved this: I kind of feel like saying, "Bring it on." You're so right. As we get older, we fear life's trials less and less. We know we can get through them. I went through a huge trial in my life 5 years ago. My daughter said, "Mom--you never even cried." I told her that I was now old enough to learn that bad things are a part of life, but they are not the only part and we can't identify ourselves by the negativity going on around us.

Excellent post, Kelly. I need to get myself to the pool too. Can you believe I have not been to the pool even once this summer? Yikes!

Dominic de Mattos said...

The thing I noticed once I passed 40 was that I could no longer eat anything and everything without affecting my waist. My hollow legs seemed to have filled in at last. I suppose I have become more conscious of the skin I'm in as I have got older.

I have been blessed with a (reasonably) calm personality and apart from the odd wound up moments, I take most things in my stride, I'm not conscious of any particular change there as I have got older. In fact the real sea change for me was the awakening of my faith and access to God's patience, gentleness, peace, joy and self control, whatever the circumstances. That was nearly 30 years ago now.

The most delicious means are those that blend bitter and sweet, sour and salt - life is good, even the challenging bits!

Take care

:Dom

T Rex Mom said...

That was one serious bit of brain food. This was profoundly deep and also inspiring. I cannot believe you just sat down and five minutes later this is what transpired. Thank you for sharing and I am so grateful to have connected with you, not-able to tan Irish girl.

Kringle said...

I enjoyed your post and am glad I'm back :)

Ken Devine said...

It's nice to have hair, full stop!
It's a good job the post didn't go banana shape, because I found this post very warm and endearing. Not sure what today will bring but after reading this it doesn't really matter...so long as it doesn't go pear shaped:)
Have a good day, my friend.

BECKY said...

Beautiful! So well said...or written! :)

I agree about aging...I'm still finding out who I am.

I love Valerie's comment that it get's better! Awesome!

And I loved Randi's, too, especially the entire paragraph about bad things being part of life, etc.

Great post!

jewelsinthegarden +: ) said...

I love the way you think!
Julie

Jenners said...

Wonderfully said. And I agree with you wholeheartedly. I think one of the things that comes with getting older is realizing that things tend to work out in the end and you have to still enjoy life while things aren't working out perfectly. You're an inspiration.

Susan Fobes said...

I could tell you were strong just from reading your posts :) Send some my way? I haven't "grown" into my 40 something skin just yet, and seem to be fighting it all the way. Sigh...send some strength my way.

Raj said...

"That core of me...that core of you... celebrating the breath of life in every beautiful human soul..
... full of honesty, warmth, reflection and humor" well said Kelly. It's comforting have this experience !

glnroz said...

I've never doubted ya,,,all you need is a red cape...

The Write Girl said...

I like reading your thoughts and hearing that things get better over time. I still feel confused about my own life. Hopefully things will start to make sense as I get older. Thanks.

Michelle said...

Go you being comfortable with who you are. That's so important in life and ... something so many of us have so many issues with. Glad you're getting there!

Gerri said...

This journey of life in an interesting one. Having meaningful folks in my life helps make it better. I am learning more about myself each day...aging like fine wine. Bless you and glad to be on this journey with a wonderful woman like you!

Charlotte (Life's a Charm!) said...

This is a wonderful post! Thanks for sharing! I have nothing more to add to this post and it's wonderful comments, except - more power to you, Kelly, and this blog! You, too, are a champion of life!

SwedishJenn said...

A beautiful post indeed! Something that set in stone my recent feelings after abandoning my blog and my few readers (you being one of those cherished virtual souls) for 8 months with nary an explanation. I apologize to you here Kelly and point you to my public apology, in hopes for forgiveness: http://blondeinsweden.blogspot.com/2011/08/bad-friend.html